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Chill Out Culture

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The All Purpose Guide on How to Handle Criticism™ has been developed for when you’ve written very silly/racist/bigoted/mean things on social media and someone has the outrageous temerity to query you on them.

1.0 Scream “You gatekeepers!” and metaphorically roll eyes at sycophants.
1.5 Important update to improve book sales of defended icon: “You OBVIOUSLY haven’t read the book!”

2.0 Complain bitterly about being censored and silenced.
2.1 Whine piteously about how the critic is being “divisive”.
2.2 Quick security fix: “You’re singling out [Insert object of emotive bias] for criticism!”
2.3 Special multi-purpose combined update – “You have no sense of humor!” “it’s just a joke!!” “It’s only words on a screen.” “Get off your computer and do something important!”

3.0 Wail about “bullying” and launch into a satisfying tirade of ad hominem. They started it.

4.0 Moan about “call out culture” and call the patronising sods out back in a never-ending loop where “discourse” disappears up its own meta-orifice.

Coming soon …

5.0 …… Intellectual honesty?

This program is evolving open source software with a Creative Commons licence, so feel free to develop your own version – if you forget to credit the above version history, expect an interloper, who will test you on your proficiency with the program.

Callout Culture

Hi ho the diddlio
A-trolling I shall go,
First thing in the morning,
while i’m still a-yawning,
sizzling up some tender meat
racist ranters smell so sweet.

Oh white saviour -
the burden of empire
faithfully carried
on the backs of the willing,
Oh white saviour -
with rightness of whiteness
imperial bait and switch
rules still over the outflung colonies
with their vanguard ingrates.

Jinjirrie, December 2013.

Related Links

B-grade politics and reaction
CastleVainia: On a divisive consensus in favour of hating identity politics


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